Love is a Nightmare
by Spoot Poot
Summary: One-Shot. Jack wants to cheer Sally up, and get her an amazing Valentines gift! What FUN! Please Review!


Spoot: Ok, trying something different here!

Jack: I honestly hope they love this as much as I do!

Spoot: ...They better...

Love is a nightmare

Sally looked on at her husband, The King of Halloween. He was busy putting together a very strange-looking Crib. It was dark in color, made of metal. The bed of the crib, was nails. The baby would sleep comfortable for sure! He struggled a bit, then let out a short 4 letter curse, then looked up at her. "oops, Excuse me." He said. She just smiled at him. "all we need now is a teddy bear." He said.

"Yes, but...no dicecting it, untill after the baby is borne." She said, placing a hand on her protruding belly.

"are you scared?" He asked, placing a bone hand on her back. She looked up at him with a smile. "terribly." She said and gave him a sweet kiss on his bony lips. considering he didn't have any.

Jack was sitting on a park bench in the pumpkin patch, with his good friend Zero. "she seems a little down today." He said. The ghost dog looked up at him. "Not that I'm complaining you see." He finished. "Its just that...well, I wanna do something special, this february 14th." Zero yipped. "I know, I know. it's the St. Valentine's massacre. I need to do something special for her!" he said, standing. "But what." He placed a bony hand on his skull. he scratched a bit, then snapped his fingers. "That's it Zero! you're right!" The dog looked up with a yip, then did a backflip.

Jack stood in the circle of trees. The ones with the holiday doors. He was standing in front of the heart. He looked down at Zero, who wined. "WHAT! It was your idea after all!" Zero lowered his head. If only Jack spoke dog...

Jack placed a hand on the knob, and gave it a little twist. the door opened, and he waisted no time in jumping in and going for a weird ride into the world of Valentine.

he landed, roughly on a pile of chocolate. he struggled to get up, all the while popping the sweet treats into his mouth. He loved chocolate! he finally got free of the mountain of sweets, and wandered, untill he found a road, made of candy hearts. "What is this?" he asked, leaning down to inspect. "Why are they so obsessed with hearts...I've seen them, this is not at all what they look like..." He looked up when he heard a strange noise. The sound of wings fluttering...

"Dont even think about it!"

Jack looked up to see a little baby, hovering above him. He looked on with a stern look. he was pointing an arrow at him.

"I wase-"

"Because Santa informed us about you!"

"Yeah, but thi-"

"And you wont get away with it!"

"I'm not-"

"Now run along! I have much work to do! Valentine's day is tomorrow!" With that, the baby flew away.

tomorrow! Oh no! he didn't have much time, hold it..they celebrated the massacre of St. Valentine here too?! how splendid! He followed the baby.

"Excuse me...uh...sir?"

The baby turned around. "CUPID!" He snapped.

"Cupid? Ok...listen, I need your help."

"I bet you do."

"Would you just listen to me! Please stop!"

Cupid landed, and placed his chubby hands on his chubby hips. Jack huffed to catch his breath. "Thank you, anyway. I need some ideas on how to make this up coming Valentine's day special, for my wife. Shes with child and very important to me..." Cupid looked confused. "first of all, how..did she...you don't look like you have...AH! Never mind...anyway...secondly, you celebrate V-Day? I thought you guys did Halloween."

"We do have holidays too! Dont you?" Jack asked. Cupid placed a hand on his chin...Did he have stubble? A baby with a 5-o-clock shadow? "Hmmm...well, I suppose we do..." Cupid slapped his hands to his sides. "No! No, go, go away!" He snapped, turning, and fluttering his little pink wings, until he rose off the ground and flew away. Jack lowered his head. Where was the boss around here? He would look for her, and get her help.

He was sure a women was in charge here. Look at this place! The ground was made of pink cotton candy...really, everything was made of candy. and the place was pretty much PINK! and frilly. and babes flew around with pink wings. He was walking around looking for any indication of a women in charge.

"I thought I told you to scoot!" Jack looked up, and there was Cupid, hovering above him again. "I'm sorry, But I really do need help! I'm looking for the women in charge here." Cupid looked confused for a moment, then he let out such a hard laugh that it made him hit the ground. "What? What did I say?" Asked Jack, looking down to inspect this kid.

"I'M THE ONE IN CHARGE HERE!" Cupid cackled out. Jack shot up right. Oh? "Really? They let a baby run things?" He asked.

"WATCH IT BUB!" Shouted cupid, standing up.

"I'm sorry, really. look, please help me...If you help...I'll leave." Jack said looking hopeful, wringing his hands together. A trait he picked up from Sally.

Cupid sighed. "FINE! I'll help you! but you hafto leave the moment we're done here!" Jack nodded so hard, his head fell off. Once his head was on the ground, he smiled up at Cupid sheepishly. Cupid just looked a bit green and cringed.

"What does she like?" Cupid asked. He was standing over a big chest full of trinkets and goodies. "Well, lets see...Night Shade." Jack said. Cupid shot him a look. "Do I wanna know?"

"Its good in tea." Said Jack.

"And you DRINK it?"

"Yes? Why?"

"How are you not dead?" Asked Cupid. Jack looked confused. "You know what...nevermind." Cupid said, going back to digging in his box of goodies. "Ahh! How about this!" He snapped, pulling out a Bowque of flowers. They were red roses. "Hmm, do you have them in black?" Jack asked. Cupid facepalmed and threw the flowers over his shoulder. "Ok...forget that..." he went back to digging. "Maybe a gift is a bad idea..." Jack said, looking over at the pile of rejected ideas, consisting of candy, teddies, and flowers.

Cupid stood upright. "Yeah..." He said thoughtfully. "no, hold on...I got it." He said, snapping his chubby fingers. "Follow me! There was this new guy a few years ago..." The two had began to make their way into another room in the pink palace. "Uh huh..." Jack urged.

"Anyway, he was a bit...lets just say, slow...and he made this..." Cupid was saying. They had made it into another room, and Cupid was going over to a cupboard. He opened it, after having to get a step stool. not sure what for, he could fly. Inside the cupboard, Jack saw something incredible!

Sally paced back and forth in the living area of their house. Her Husband had been gone all night, and she was incredibly worried. Zero was watching her with protective eyes. The front door swung open and in walked Shock. "JACKS BACK!" Sally looked over at the little girl dressed as a witch. "Dont you dare start singing!" Sally snapped. Shock just giggled evilly and opened her mouth to break into song, when Lock, Who was behind her, placed a hand on her mouth. "Oh no you don't." He snapped. Shock turned around and shoved the little boy. "STUPID!" She snapped.

Jack was indeed, back. As Lock had said. He was coming through the gate, walking with a wide stride, as usual. Sally was approaching him. She looked worried. "Sally, I have som-" She slapped him so hard his head fell off.

"-Ething for you..." He finished dully. "Oh!" She said, picking his head up and bringing it eye level. He smiled. "Where have you been?!" She snapped. "Well, If you put me back together, I'll explain everything!" She put his head back where it belonged, but she did not look pleased. I'm not sitting through another town meeting."

Jack laughed. "No, I agree with you. that's boring." with that, he got down on one knee, in the middle of TOWN! "We're already married, get up!" she snapped. Jack giggled. "Sally, you are the love of my after life..." She looked around at all the towns folk showing up to see what all the fuss was. "Oh gods..." She groaned, placing her hands over her face, clearly embarrassed, "Dont make me poison you..."

Jack looked happy. "Hunny, you don't hafto cook tonight." The werwolf suddenly piped up, "Rrruts Thrat?!" he asked.

"Ah, yes. the reason I'm making a fool out of myself..." Jack said, reaching behind his back, to grab an overly large black sack. he couldn't really move it, so he pulled at the string at the top, and the bag fell to the ground, reviling a tall life looking doll. It was ugly, and deformed. it looked like a burn unit victim. HE WAS SOOOO CUTE! "What is that?" She asked.

"You mean who is it?"

"Who is it?"

"You mean who was it?"

Sally sighed.

"I'm sorry my love, but I cant help but pick on you. This is Watkins. He is just what we need around the house!"

"What do you mean?" Sally asked, reaching out a small hand to touch the doll. it looked at her, and smiled. She retracted her hand away with a yelp. Jack laughed. "Meet you're new baby sitter, cook, butler...maid...you name it."

"Where did you get this!" She snapped.

"Cupid." Jack said simply, shrugging his shoulders.

"What is a Cupid?" Asked The Mayor. His face was NOT Happy.

"A flying baby..." Said Jack, and The Mayors face changed to his usual happy.

"Jack, why?" Asked Sally.

"Its St. Valentine." Jack said.

"I know what day it is." said Sally. Her voice annoyed.

"No, its..him..." Jack said, gesturing his hands at the doll, who then reached out his for Sally's hand. Everyone looked on in amazement at the fact that THE St. Valentine was standing in town square.

"He's yours." Said jack. Sally looked over at him, then down at the hand being outstretched. she placed her hand it the dolls, and he kissed her knuckles. She blushed and smiled over at Jack. "ok, ok. you're forgiven..." She said. Jack smiled largely. He knew she would eventually, anyway. But the look on her face, as she looked at one of the best gifts EVER...That was all the forgiveness he needed.

Spoot: The end!

Jack: That was wanderfull!


End file.
